y am i staying in an It’s no secret, you lay in bed at night asking the same question over and over again “Why am I staying in an unhealthy relationship?” hoping to get a different answer to what you already know is true. You feel like it’s better the devil you know than the one you don’t, but is it?
You stay in an unhealthy relationship because it is filling a need. A need you believe you are unable to fill anywhere else so you settle for less than you deserve. That relationship can be with a significant other, a sibling that is not very nice, a job you don’t like or even your use of food, alcohol or spending to fill a need you are having a hard time meeting through healthy means.
Many people stay in unhealthy relationships for years thinking they are stuck or have no choice. The truth is the answer to getting out of an unhealthy relationship is pretty simple and easy to correct, it starts with you!
“Your relationship is a reflection of the one you have with yourself.”
If you have an unhealthy relationship with yourself, it will be reflected in the relationships you have with others. You treat yourself poorly, you will accept the same behavior of others upon you. If you have a low self-esteem and don’t think you are worthy or deserving, you will let others walk all over you. You feel unlovable you will accept people who treat you that way. At the end of the day it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
You can change it all and get out of unhealthy relationships and into healthy ones by starting with you.
Start believing you are worthy. You didn’t need to do anything to be loved when you were born. Nothing changed as you grew up. You are worthy of being loved just because you are you. Start treating yourself with the love and respect you desire now.
Know you are deserving. You are deserving of a healthy relationship with yourself and others. One that is based on unconditional love. You are deserving of kindness and consideration start with practicing giving it to yourself now.
Learn to F.L.Y. – First Love Yourself! You will never do good things for someone you don’t like so learn to F.L.Y. now. Eliminate the unhealthy relationship you have with yourself by treating yourself as you would a stranger in need. Give yourself the gift of love and acceptance. Be nice to yourself and value the gift you were given just being born.
Believe you are already good enough. You may feel you need to be more to have all that you desire but you are already good enough. There is nothing you need to do or be that would make you more perfect. Know that you are already good enough, perfectly imperfect making you one of a kind.
Remember you are a human “being” not a human “doing”. Start being in this moment the best version of yourself and celebrate the gifts you bear and share them with the world.
Once you start applying these simple suggestions you will find the next time you ask yourself, “Why am I staying in an unhealthy relationship?” you will know it isn’t about you any longer.