There is hope for anyone wanting to free themselves from the struggles of fitting in and not feeling good enough. Learning to love yourself for who you are and not for whom you think you should be. Willing to leave the past behind you and not beating yourself up over things that were out of your control at the time. Learning to be grateful and appreciate all that you have now versus waiting to have the perfect life, so you can be happy. Stop comparing yourself to others to fit a mold that does not exist and start to be the Best “You”, You Can Be!
So where do you start?1. Have a Positive Self Image • It is good to be helpful, but do not feel the need to do all things for other people. Take care of YOU first!• Treat yourself kindly by not expecting others to make you feel good about yourself. You are already great!• Forgive and Forget and try not to hang on painful memories from the past. It does not serve you to open wounds.• Avoid focusing on what you cannot do, instead focus on what you can do and the things you can accomplish without expecting the need of approval and recognition from others. Accept yourself as you are right now.• Accept imperfections by focusing on what you have gained from the process of doing the best you can instead of focusing on what wasn’t done. It is okay to allow yourself to make mistakes and forgive yourself.• You will never live and have successes if you have never failed. Go out and make mistakes it means you are living a full life.
2. Obtain a Positive Body Image • Learn to love what you see in the mirror. Start my saying nice things to yourself. It can start with “you have nice eyes”.• BE a friend to your body, not its enemy. Tell it nice things daily. Thank if for taking care of you.• Everyday tell yourself what you are grateful for, some days it may be just two hands, two feet etc.• We all wish to look our best; however, a healthy body isnot continuously linked to appearance.• Healthy lifestyle decisions can also improve your body image.• Change your body image by changing your approach and your manner on how you think about your body.• Exercise regularly to boost self-esteem, confidence and energy level. Don’t exercise to fight your body but do it to make your body healthy and strong.• Getting plenty of rest, it is vital to manage stress and anxiety.• Make a list of all the things your body lets you do and read it often.• Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired learn to H.A.L.T. Eat when hungry and take a rest when you’re tired.
3. “Take Care of Your Mothers Daughter” This is best advice I can give you and the wisest woman I have ever met, my grandma, gave it to me. As she watched me kill myself and feel responsible for everything and everyone in my life, she would plead with me and say, “Baby, take care of your mothers’ daughter”. We are so good at taking care of everyone else, isn’t it time you take care of the most important person in the world, “your mothers daughter!” Wouldn’t you want the best for her? If you said yes, then you have to treat her that way. It is not in our nature to hurt anyone, yet we make it ok to hurt ourselves. This needs to stop. You are worth so much. You make a difference just being here. You have a purpose, to serve yourself first and the people you touch in your life.
Start with Positive Self Talk…Your Body Hears Everything You Say So Be Nice To It. You are your body and you have been hearing a lot of abuse over the years!It is time to stop and start taking care of it with tender loving care. Feed it love and acceptance, kindness and praise. Encourage it and nurture it to be your best friend. Change the stories you tell yourself. Most of them are not true. Change the tape, put in a new DVD and reprogram your mind for a happy and healthy future.Feed your mind with good thoughts and positive affirmations, feed your body with healthy food choices, not with comfort foods or convenience, you are special, treat yourself. Take care of your mind, body, and soul.
Do something physical create some endorphins with movement, they produce not only a reduction in pain sensation but also increased feelings of euphoria, a reduction in appetite, and release of sex hormones. So get out and do things, take a walk with a family member, friend, or dog, exercise in moderation, dance, play outside with a child, join a club, yoga, pilates, or just get a massage.If you need to get a handle on your fear of being not good enough, please reach out. We can help you can get on with your life.